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I am so friggin’ moisturized. | Speedkin

I am so friggin’ moisturized.

GAPS Intro, Day 11.  Things are still going well… almost.  Night before last, we had to go to a 4-H Christmas dinner and we were to bring “finger foods”.  Knowing there wouldn’t likely be much of anything there for use to eat (more on that in a minute), I decided I’d better take a couple of things we could at least munch on to avoid boredom while everyone else ate.  (And, no, we couldn’t skip the dinner.  You’re required to attend so many meetings each year in order to do 4-H things so we had to go and watch everyone else eat.  Argh.)

I ended up making these brownies from The Well Fed Homestead — not quite GAPS Intro legal (because I used regular cocoa powder and vanilla extract) but not bad.  Ew.  We didn’t like them.  Charlie and Duke said they were okay but I think that’s just because they were desperate.  Heh.  I felt like complete crap & had a massive headache for 24 hours.  The kids didn’t have any reactions, thankfully.  It might have been something I forgot or did wrong — or maybe it’s just because we’re not big chocolate freaks that we didn’t care for them.  I’ll try it again in a few weeks.  I also made these absolutely wonderful peanut butter cups from Grain-Free Foodies!  Oh, man, they are sooo good!  (I know they weren’t the problem because I’ve already had all of the ingredients without any issues.)  I spooned the mix into peanut butter cup candy molds I have and froze them.  Because they’re mostly coconut oil,, they don’t get too hard to eat, just perfect.  Really, you have to try them!

The water weight loss seems to be slowing down now, right on time, as I’m down about 10 pounds since we started this.  I do seem to be having trouble eating enough.  There’s so much fat in what we eat, it doesn’t take much to fill me up, plus I find myself forgetting to eat.  That’s an old problem of mine, forgetting to eat, that I haven’t experienced in a few years!  It’s not a good problem to have — our bodies need fuel to run and even more so to heal.  I need to get a handle on it.

Yesterday, I started a bunch of pickles fermenting in one of the big Pickl-Its.  I think that’s the ferment we’re all most excited about!  I am trying to NOT get my hopes up too much for this batch, however.  I couldn’t find any pickling cucumbers this time of year so had to settle for slicing (English) cucumbers.  Ew.  But ya gotta work with what ya have, right?  These stupid things were so greasy from whatever crap they put on them to prevent shrinking & wrinkling, it was gross.  I had to find something to wipe my hands on in the store after just picking them up and putting them in the produce bag.  Disgusting.  I scrubbed those suckers like they were covered in maggot-infested pig crap.  I also started a couple of jars of beet kvass finally.  I’d had to wait for some jars & PI lids to be free or I’d have done them already.  I can’t wait to taste both new ferments!  By the way, the kimchi is now in the fridge, doing an additional 10-week cool ferment.  It smells so good!

Last night, I whipped up a quick batch of honey & coconut milk soap and set it to mold overnight.  It’s now curing on the organ.  I also decided to try my hand at coming up with my own, customized lotion recipe.  I love it better than any other I’ve tried so far!  Here’s what I did:

Melt 400 grams cocoa butter and 400 grams shea butter over low heat, then add in 200 grams avocado oil, 200 grams sweet almond oil, 20 vitamin E capsules (snipped open to squeeze the oil into the mix), and 40 drops each lemon and orange oils.  (I know some folks have trouble with citrus oils & sunlight but I never have.)  I poured it into a couple of big jars, stirring occasionally as it cooled, and left it overnight to finish setting up to whatever consistency it would be.  I lucked out because it was exactly as I wanted it.  This morning, I scooped it back out of the jars and stuck it in the KitchenAid with the whisk attachment, and whipped it, whipped it real good.  (Don’t tell me I’m the only one who remembers that stupid song?)  I whipped it a few minutes until it was light & fluffy, the consistency of good ol’ real whipped cream.  I scooped that fluffy mess into a couple of big jars for home use, and couple of small tubs to throw in my purse, and four half-pint jars for gift-giving.  Crap.  I’d better label them before Josie finds them and eats it all, thinking it is whipped cream.

I’m also in the middle of making a double batch of honey coconut milk soap this morning.  I figured as long as I have the stuff already out, I might as well go to town.  Might make another batch or two before I put it all away…  I’m also making some healing salve and finishing up that bee sting/insect bite salve for the MVBA silent auction this weekend.  Good thing the kids are working on independent projects in the basement this afternoon!

FYI: You know how, when baking and cooking, you drop bits on your hands and lick them off, taste a bit from this spoon, and from that pan and, before you know it, you’re stuffed?  Same thing happens when making soaps & lotions.  Well, except  you don’t eat them.  You drop a bit of this here — and rub it into your left arm.  You drop a bit of that stuff there — and rub it into your right arm.  You want to see how quickly this oil absorbs so you rub a bit on your left leg.  Hm, you wonder how that other fat will feel on your face so you rub a bit in there…  And pretty soon, you’re like a greased pig, sliding around the kitchen like a crazed pinball and you can’t hang on to a single spoon or spatula.  Yeah, I’m pretty moisturized right now.

5 Responses to “I am so friggin’ moisturized.”

  1. Ilene December 6, 2012 at 3:15 pm #

    LOL! I can kinda visualize that.

  2. Paula December 6, 2012 at 3:24 pm #

    ha ha you make me laugh so much with your writing.

    • Jessica December 7, 2012 at 8:18 pm #

      That’s exactly what I was thinking!

  3. Jo December 7, 2012 at 12:01 pm #

    Love it!

    I agree with Paula.

  4. Chris December 7, 2012 at 2:52 pm #

    I have to agree with Ilene. Too funny!

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